Celebrating Heaven Because of Christmas

Recently I knelt at Allie’s grave (even writing that brings a fresh deluge of tears).  As I knelt, I could almost hear her voice saying “be happy for me daddy.”  I responded by saying “I am trying darling, I am really trying.” 

The reality is she is fine.  She is in perfection.  She is not in loss, pain, and agony.  She is in Heaven.  In one sense to wish her back is the height of selfishness, but that is what we want.  We want her back.  But in wanting her back we don’t think of the consequence that would be to her. 

What torment - to have been in perfection in Heaven and then to be thrust back down to this imperfect and painful earth!  I can’t imagine what loss that would be for her.  And yet, that is what our hearts yearn for.  At the root it is selfish.

To be fully led by love, would be to be able to celebrate that she is in Heaven.  And surely there is a part of us that does, albeit a very small part right now, but nonetheless it is there! 

This then leads me to thinking about what Jesus did for us:  He left Heaven to enter into earth.  And He did it so that we too could enter into the perfection of Heaven through Him. 

What love.  What sacrifice.  What a price.  Let us not lose sight of this as we celebrate His birth this Christmas. 

Because of what He did, Allie is in Heaven.  And because of what He did, each of us can have the promise of Heaven if we will trust in Him.  Truly Amazing Grace! 

“Thank you Jesus for what you did.  Forgive me for my selfish heart.  Please grant me the grace to be happy for Allie, especially during this Christmas season.  Grant us the peace of Heaven I pray in Jesus’ name, Amen.”

Jeff Powell

An Honest Prayer

Sharing a prayer from my journal with you...

“Lord, I find it hard to trust in You right now.  I am so thankful that You deal with us in Your mercy and grace.  I know that I deserve Your judgment.  Honestly, I have not accurately represented You.  But of course You know that full well.  Nothing surprises You. 

Time.  What an invention by us.  Time is not the same with You.  You see the beginning the middle and the end SIMULTANEOUSLY.  My mind has a hard time grasping this, but I know it to be so.  In one sense, I am already in Heaven with You, joined again with Allie in perfect peace.  Could this be what You meant when You taught us the model prayer to pray ‘Your Kingdom come, Your will be done one earth as it is in Heaven’?  Could it be that the real challenge of this life is to live in such a way as we are already in Heaven?  Could it be possible for the realities of Heaven themselves to overtake the realities of the here and now?  Oh how I hope so. 

I am tired of pain.  I am tired of loss.  I am tired of mourning.  I am tired of being tired.  And yet somehow in between now and then in Heaven, there is a work that is to be done by You through us.  At times I see glimpses of that work.  Other times, I am like a blind man seeing nothing. 

Lord thank You for being the all knowing, all seeing God that You are.  Help me to have the eyes that You have.  Help me to be the son that sees like his dad, acts like his dad, talks like his dad, and even feels like his dad.  Honestly though, I just want what I see as the good in this.  The reality is that Your heart must be touched by the evil, hurt, pain, suffering, and loss that exists in Your world.  Such a weight is far too heavy for me to bear.  So thank You that Your timing is perfect and that I can trust in what You have revealed to me now.  Thank You that You don’t require me to trust in what has yet to be, but only in what is.  Help me to see it day by day and be content to trust in the now.  In Jesus name I pray, Amen.”

Jeff Powell

The Process

There has to be an order to life.  A plan.  A purpose.  A goal.  I don’t always see it.  But I do see the process leading to it.

I do not always like the process.  But the process is what produces the end result.  Even still I do not like it.  I want it to be over - done - finished - complete.  But alas, it is not.  There is more work to be done.  More changes that need to be made.  More development.  More maturity.  More of Jesus and less of Jeff. 

And God uses the thing called process to do this.  He refines.  He does what He does best.  He builds, He remodels, He makes, He destroys.  But through it all, He has a plan for the process.  And His plan is good, even if it is not by my standards of goodness. 

I can rest in the process, knowing that there is One who is behind it all making sense out of it all.  I may not know this side of Heaven all of the “why’s” for what He has done.  But I trust that there is a “why” and I must be okay with that. 

Process.  Honestly, it is painful most of the time.  But what does it produce?  Purpose.  I may not yet see it, but I trust that it is there. 

“Keep me on the process Lord.  Allow me to be submitted to your loving hands that know best and do what You see is needed to be done.  Even when I don’t like it.  When it hurts.  When I complain.  When I want out and off of it, please deal with me in Your mercy, love, and grace.  Please allow me to see what I need to see and when I need to see it.  And please allow me to rest confident that You are in control and give me what I need day by day and moment by moment to stay on the process you have laid out for me.  Thank you Lord, In Jesus name I pray.  Amen.”

Jeff Powell